for the love of me, i cannot remember

ok i'm gonna tell u ppl something that i do sometimes and it may seem narcissistic but i don't do it to gloat. i do it to find out what ppl say abt me or my music.

ok here it is...

ready...

set...



i google my name


ok now u know me a bit better. HAHA.

hey if i could be more of a musician and less of a public figure then i would. but these two go hand in hand if u want ur music to be heard. the least i could do is work on my musicianship... in hiding... heh...

sooooo aaaanyways... while traversing the world wide web, i stumbled upon my primary schmate's blog. she had a post about the times in primary sch and i was really amazed at her thoughts. and also the fact that she remembered sooo many things that i cannot remember. even the ones abt me. and i can't believe that she thought the way she did when she was that young. i must've been like a caveman in her eyes. haha!

but seriously.... well... it could be e whole puberty thing.. like girls maturing faster than guys. seems like e right age too. like 11-12.

and she went on abt how e guys always bullied e girls. and i felt depressed right there and then. like e girls were apparently really affected by it. :( hmmm... i guess i was annoying. but i didn't know better. i think between 10-13 for guys is like e age of confusion. like halfway through, u don't know whether u're teasing or flirting. and you think u've gotten weird so you tease girls even more to feel secure about yourself. plus u're cool if u could annoy girls.

so like after 13 or so then u find out that it's actuali ok to flirt and like girls. and then can SOUND STEADY.

AAAAAAAHAAHAHHAHAA

k anyways.

so yea.. i think for my friend, that was her period of growth. urrrmmm... no pun on e period yea. so mayb she remembers things more vividly. that time came like at 15 for me i think. and when i think about it, i go like "what the hell was i thinking??" haha...

i remembered in pri 5, i'd walk up and down the class the way ace ventura walked. and i'd make faces and voices. and i'd think i was funny. when in actuality all i was was an annoying kid. haha... and when i transfered to another pri sch i remember feeling bummed bcos e guys n girls were starting to like each other in my former sch. and on my first day at the new sch, a group of girls wanted to meet me during recess. i thought they wanted to beat me up. HAHA. i was e onli one wearing blue in the sea of beige and i hated it.

but yea... i think things happen for a reason. i wasn't doing too well in my studies. it got a lot better after i transfered. and like i got to go for two primary sch camps. haha!

i remember a certain teacher calling me a dreamer in class...

some things never change... :)